How To Tell If An Apology Is Sincere

May 30, 2018

© Katarzyna Bialasiewicz | Dreamstime

Sorry used to be the hardest word to say but from Mark Zuckerberg to Harvey Weinstein and the most recent apology from Roseanne Barr, who’s TV re-boot was cancelled by ABC after posting racist tweets, sorry seems to flow off the lips faster than the actions that prompted it. But how can you tell if an apology is sincere when so many are offered? A psychotherapist offers clues to the sincerity of an apology.  First, those made in person come across as most sincere. Relationships are built on mutual empathy, so to see some of your hurt mirrored in the other person’s expressions is important. A linguistics professor says another sign of an insincere apology are vague statements, such as “I apologize if anyone was offended” and “I’m sorry for what I said.” These usually indicate the person is trying to shirk responsibility. Watch out for people who try to push off their mistake onto other people or circumstances. Sincere apologies are ones where a person really explores what they said or did wrong. For instance, when retired Gen. David Petraeus resigned as director of the CIA for allegedly providing classified information to a woman with whom he was having an affair, his apology not only reflected on what he did wrong and also included how he was going to behave in the future. Don't be quick to discount late apologies either.  Some people need time to reflect on why they need to apologize.  It really comes down to the action that accompany the apology.

SOURCE: Moneyish

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