Four Digital Rules For Loving Couples

March 22, 2019


On average, we check our smartphone about 46 times a day!  That's so much time that it can seem our phones are a third party in the relationship between you and your sweetie! There are numerous reports that support the idea that putting your phone down is not only healthy for yourself but your romantic relationships. So here are our ways to ensure that the digital part of your relationship is healthy. There's a good chance you've phubbed before. That is when you or someone you are talking to snubs you in the middle of a conversation to scroll through their phone.  One 2017 study of married couples found that phubbing your spouse is linked to depression in the other person and worse relationship satisfaction. So avoid phubbing and give your love your undivided attention. Make sure you post carefully on social media. A study published in Psychology of Popular Media Culture found that “excessive” social media PDA (public displays of affection) is actually associated with lower levels of relationship satisfaction. That doesn’t mean all couple-based social media activity is bad. Posting content that shows couple unity, like a Facebook profile picture, can increase feelings of closeness and relationship satisfaction. The key is to be on the same page as your partner. Take a social media inventory with your partner and say to them, ‘What’s important to you? Is it important to you that a picture of us goes up?' Then, post accordingly. Set expectations around texting. In particular, sending and receiving messages.  You should generally not read too much into texting habits unless it’s habitual. An unanswered text probably just means your partner is busy. Take it up a notch and send an unexpected text of support, love or even a joke. You have no idea how meaningful it can be when they’re stressed out to hear from you. Finally make sure you are not micro-cheating.  That is to beware of sending or receiving flirtatious texts, which can cause a slew of relationship issues. The best strategy is open communication and a shared understanding of what’s acceptable. If you find yourself purposefully concealing online activity from your partner, it should be a red flag that you’re violating this agreement.

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